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Socceroos Haiku: Ange Postecoglou Lost in Translation

By Athas Zafiris @ArtSapphire · On November 20, 2014

In a plush hotel room in Osaka, in a steam filled bathroom, a hand reached out and turned off the super jet powered shower. For 30 minutes Ange Postecoglou stood, mostly motionless, under the hot hydro torrent, cleansing himself of yet another Socceroos defeat; this time to the Samurai Blue.

The loss was not unexpected.  But it did rankle with him. The team’s inability to create meaningful chances when in the ascendancy combined with shoddy defending when under pressure led to inevitable defeat.

Ange put on a fluffy bathrobe, walked out of the bathroom, poured himself a generous measure of Suntory Whisky and plonked himself on the king size bed. He grabbed the remote and switched on the television.

Hmmm…the offerings of Japanese late night TV. Repeats of old samurai films, yakuza films, sadistic game shows and CNN. Nothing grabbed him. He picked up the hotel magazine and leafed through it.

“Haiku – DIY Japanese Poetry,” the headline read. His curiosity was piqued

“Traditional haiku in English is created with 17 sounds (syllables) in three phrases of 5, 7 and 5,” the article advised. “We have left the page opposite blank for you to practice.”

Ange picked up the magazine, his tumbler of whisky and moved over to desk. He sat himself down, located a ballpoint pen, put it in his mouth and started chewing on the cap. “I can do this,” he thought to himself.

He took the pen out of his mouth, took off the mangled plastic blue cap, gulped down what was left in the tumbler and started writing.

All that possession
in a dominant first half
but no shoot farken
I played 4 3 3
they came out 4 2 3 1
second half sorrow
He is no Neuer
despite Ryan shot stopping
two Japanese goals
Aziz on the left
 a good game a decent cross
Tim’s head does the rest
Wilko Sainsbury
one of them will have to make way
for Spiranovic
Honda Serie A
Kagawa
Bundesliga
Luongo League One
Always quick to judge
screw armchair experts doubting
Asian Cup success
Sayonara

 

Ange PostecoglouAsian CupSocceroos
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